Escape or Leave

With all of those Immense insecurities  
Something beautiful clouded my mind
Like a dark patch of fog, stick to my reality
Leaving joy hard to find within dark head

It sticks to my eyes, as rubbing them makes me feel
I can’t see past my hands, drenching in blood
And buzzes around me like a swarm of flies, itching me in black
I choke on my words, words baseless and meaningless
As they get covered me with doubt, with each passing day to make me feel bad.

I cough them out, For all to see and believe
It feels so hard, To be free
Even though it’s right in front of me, venomous for me to exist
I hate myself, existencial hate gateway to nothing
For thinking this way, way which doesn’t exist or feel real

I don’t want to feel, Like I’m just a drag
Like I should pack my bag, And leave never to be seen again

Like a little cloud, grey and heavy
Could make the screams so loud, for world to listen
Here I lay while it covers me, in white
I don’t know long it’ll be, still my drunk walk leads me to my grave

As when the birds have nested long, And the moon grows bright.
You won’t see me then, As in fullest day –
After twilight’s shadows fall, I will slip away.
I won’t stir you from your sleep, You’ll not see me cry or feel miserable or toxic

To what i can please is don’t leave
with only one question, Can you love?
The broken version of me?

She Is Away, in Winter Nest

You can shed tears that she is gone
Or you can smile because she has been living far

You can close your eyes and pray that she will come back
Or you can open your eyes and see all that she has left with a journey of never coming back,

Your heart can be empty because you can’t see her
Or you can be full of the love that you shared and envisioned a new you in you,

You can turn your back on tomorrow and live yesterday with all of red and black
Or you can be happy for tomorrow because of yesterday with all of white and colourful glory,

You can remember her and only that she is gone
Or you can cherish her memory and let it live on

You can cry and close your mind, be empty and turn your back
Or you can do what she would want: smile, open your eyes, love and go on.

To an unread poet.

I used to read your poems
but lately, you don’t write,

you’re silent and aloof
you know that isn’t right.

You can’t close a door once opened
you can’t abolish all your dreams

you’re a poet of the heart
mustn’t fall apart at the seams.

Say what you can in words
they speak the message true

spoken from the heart
the poems will see you through.

A hermit’s not your style
a recluse, you are not

never give up writing
of things that you’ve been taught.

I used to read your poems
I’d read them once again
if you would send them out

Prospecting Risks

To laugh is to risk appearing the fool.
To weep is to risk appearing sentimental.
To reach for another is to risk involvement.
To expose your ideas, your dreams,
before a crowd is to risk their loss.
To love is to risk not being loved in return.
To live is to risk dying.
To believe is to risk despair.
To try is to risk failure.

But risks must be taken, because
the greatest hazard in life is to risk nothing.

The people who risk nothing, do nothing,
have nothing, are nothing.
They may avoid suffering and sorrow,
but they cannot learn, feel, change,
grow, love, live.

Chained by their attitudes they are slaves;
they have forfeited their freedom.
Only a person who risks is free.

THE OCEAN OF NO

The Ocean has its silent caves,

Deep, quiet, and alone;

Though there be fury on the waves,

Beneath them there is none.

The awful spirits of the deep

Hold their communion there;

And there are those for whom we weep,

The young, the bright, the fair.

Calmly the wearied seamen rest

Beneath their own blue sea.

The ocean solitudes are blest,

For there is purity.

The earth has guilt, the earth has care,

Unquiet are its graves;

But peaceful sleep is ever there,

Beneath the dark blue waves.

When Tomorrow Starts Without Me by Erica Shea Liupaeter

When tomorrow starts without me,
and I’m not there to see;
If the sun should rise and find your eyes, all filled with tears for me;
I wish so much you wouldn’t cry,
the way you did today,
while thinking of the many things,
we didn’t get to say.
I know how much you love me,
as much as I love you,
and each time that you think of me, I know you’ll miss me too;
But when tomorrow starts without me, please try to understand,
that an Angel came and called my name, and took me by the hand,
and said my place was ready,
in heaven far above,
and that I’d have to leave behind, all those I dearly love.
But as I turned to walk away, a tear fell from my eye,
for all life, I’d always thought, I didn’t want to die.
I had so much to live for, so much yet to do,
it seemed almost impossible, that I was leaving you.
I thought of all the yesterdays, the good ones and the bad,

I thought of all the love we shared, and all the fun we had.
If I could relive yesterday, just even for awhile,
I’d say goodbye and kiss you and maybe see you smile.
But then I fully realized, that this could never be,
for emptiness and memories, would take the place of me.
And when I thought of worldly things, I might miss come tomorrow,
I thought of you, and when I did,
my heart was filled with sorrow.
But when I walked through heaven’s gates, I felt so much at home.
When God looked down and smiled at me, from His great golden throne,
He said, “This is eternity,
and all I’ve promised you”.
Today for life on earth is past,
but here it starts anew.
I promise no tomorrow,
but today will always last,
and since each day’s the same day, there’s no longing for the past.
But you have been so faithful,
so trusting and so true.
Though there were times you did some things, you knew you shouldn’t do.

But you have been forgiven and now at last you’re free. So won’t you take my hand and share my life with me?
So when tomorrow starts without me, don’t think we’re far apart,
for every time you think of me,
I’m right here, in your heart.

Dead Flower

It’s was a knock on the door;
With which elevated heartbeat were heard.
while paying attention to what they’re trying to tell him.

Early realisation about the person who made the promise, but did not return.
With said so it’s complicated here.
As it had came here just yesterday, or has been here for a while living inside something dead!

She isn’t missing him at all.
He hasn’t forgotten about her.

There will be no sudden sadness If his house collapses,
as it will be the same pain again. burdened!!
Like the one, i created with my own hands.
Pain which is built with my own hands.

He doesn’t miss her at all.
She hasn’t considered him.

With time he was immersed in the world of books & words.
Among the dusty pages of a book or broken words you will find him.
Where if you get lost among the solecistic stars of his death.

Your heart still magically will have him, smiling & confused.
And with this emptiness contains a rose, poetic red.
And it is ready for you, soaked in my tears and blood
And that rose represents his dead love.

Where have you vanished? Was I ever going to see him again?
There will come a time when her nights will not be as safe and secure without him.

You’ll see.
He’ll miss you then.
I’m aware of it.

Metro Star

My apologies to chance for calling it necessity.
My apologies to necessity if I’m mistaken, after all.
Please, don’t be angry, happiness, that I take you as my due.
May my dead be patient with the way my memories fade.
My apologies to time for all the world I overlook each second.
My apologies to past loves for thinking that the latest is the first.
Forgive me, distant wars, for bringing flowers home.
Forgive me, open wounds, for pricking my finger.
I apologize for my record of minuets to those who cry from the depths.
I apologize to those who wait in pain for being asleep today at five in the morning.

She sings

Severities of daylight mark my eye
yet still she sings, in airy consciousness,
as if a distant bell, struck in the night, 
was ringing me awake with its old cry 

to beauty, breaking out beneath the seen,
with music of a tender, healing kind,
adorning all of Earth’s appearances
with hands that wait outstretched for love to find

the place where my affection holds its course-
unwounded, while the brutal tug of will
secures itself with bright seductive chains;
I feel those slackened links upon me still,

yet dullened is that glinting of before-
the clinking shackles soften as she sings
somewhere above the startled waning world,
wherein we stare into the lives of things.

Yearn

Fingers heartbound pumping black blood
Knotted up in air, chocking the living
Gaze darting lost, speeding for the heart
Watching dancing, lost in the beats

Frozen in movement, he stands by
Desire for desire, landing for a new relationship
Masked by panic, chaos and exploration
Intoxicate, taken hundred steps away
Lost in descent deception

Bodies complement with count for lust
Space absent touch, with a lot to feel
Concern ego lust, craves for more
Parting hesitate, with soul begged up

Yearn